He Told Me Where To Find God

I rode on my bike behind my brother and our two friends, Marshall and Quan. Marshall was leading our group. His dreads swayed as he pumped his way up the hill. I watched his leg muscles flex in front of me and ignored the butterflies that appeared in my stomach. This is how it always was. I was the girl with the guys. The tom boy among the girls. The enjoyer of books, mud pies, climbing trees, wrestling, busted lip and bloody knees. But no one knew this about me because I was also a shadow. The weed in a field of tulips.



We biked through our neighborhood, past the line of houses and apartment buildings.
"Come on, guys! We're almost there," Marshall yelled. He turned back to look at us and without thinking my legs begin to pump harder. I sped past my brother and Quan and was keeping speed with Marshall. My heart was beating and I was huffing a bit, but I turned and looked up at Marshall. He was staring straight ahead, oblivious to the change in our order.

The summer sun was beating down on our neighborhood, an advocate for our freedom and our journey. We sped through the city, past the traffic and abandoned buildings, past the bus stops and empty recycle bins, past the man selling old newspapers and the woman asking for spare change.

My legs hurt, but I had to keep up with Marshall. His eyes turned a beautiful hazel as rays of sun stretched across his face. I wondered how his skin would feel under the sun? If his hands would be sweaty when I finally held them.

"Tasha." I turned around and looked at my brother. His chubby cheeks were swollen with air as he fell behind us. I turned back to Marshall, but he continued to stare ahead, determined to reach our destination as fast as possible. I sighed and slowed down, allowing Quan to pass me.

"You gotta keep up Illya."
"Can't we take a break? We biked all the way into the business area."
"I know, but Marshall says this is the best hill in the city and that no one knows about it, but us. We can claim it."
"Do we have to?"
"Yeah, come on. Bike harder."
And he did because he was my little brother and whatever big sister said was always right. That was one reason I loved him so much. My little brother would always be my little brother.

We rode behind an old building and up a hill that lead into a small clearing where there was a trail to the forest.

"This way, guys."
"We have to go into the forest?" Quan asked.
Marshall nodded, "It's a path that leads back down to the city. No one knows about it. It's the best ride ever."
"Are we even allowed back here?" Quan asked, the youngest of us all.
"Are you a chicken?"
"No."
"I've done this a thousand times. Just follow me, Quan."
I stared into the mass of trees and green, unable to see its depth. My stomach churned.
"That must be a really steep hill if it takes us back to the city," I said hiding the uncertainty in my voice.
He glared at me, "Are you scared,too?"
Yes.
"No."
"Then, come on." He biked towards the forest. Quan and Illya followed behind him with shaking handle bars. I took in a deep breath and brought up the rear.

 Suddenly, a man emerged from the trees. He shook his head, narrowed his eyes and said, "Don't go back there."

We were silent.

"Don't go back there. I'm telling you. God's back there."
God?
"God's back there. You shouldn't go back there."
"He's crazy," Marshall said, "let's go." The others rode into the trees anddisappeared, but I was frozen. The man turned to me. My mouth became dry and my hands began to sweat.
God was back there? What if he really was? What would happen to my friends?Would they meet God? Could I?

The man shook his head, "Don't. I've seen him. He's back there. You don't want to meet him...not yet. God fearing."
God fearing. We are all raised to be God fearing.
The man stepped towards me, out of the trees with rays of light beaming behind him. An aura had formed around him and suddenly I knew I couldn't meet God. I wasn't ready. I was still scared. I was still God fearing. So, I turned on my bike and raced away from God. I rode past  the traffic and abandoned buildings, past the bus stops and empty recycle bins, past the man selling old newspapers and the woman asking for spare change into my neighborhood past the line of apartment buildings and houses.

And everything blurred and the road was bumpy, but that hill would have been bumpier because that was God and I wasn't ready yet.